Category Archives: Beneath the Distant Star

4 #WritingTips To Make Your Writing Better

We’ve all been given writing tips that have helped us improve our writing skills.
Hopefully these will help you too.
These are the best tips I’ve been given, you may have different or better ones…
please share them in the comments, as we’re all here to learn and grow!

4 #WritingTips to make your Writing Better - The Last Krystallos

Said is not dead - it's alive and well - Four #WritingTips To Make Your Writing Better - The Last Krystallos

Said – is not dead… © Lisa Shambrook

1. Dialogue…I try not to go too fancy, I stick to said in general and ignore all those flowery replacements especially the pretentious ones. The internet is full of ‘Said is dead’ and ‘Over 200 ways to say said’, and maybe at school, whilst increasing your vocabulary, it’s great to learn new ways to say said but in a novel be sparing with your speech tags. Editors and authors know that dialogue is part of the story and speech tags are purely there to inform which character is speaking and when. Most dialogue tags should be invisible to the readers so as not to detract from the story.

If you’re character moaned, muttered, grumbled, murmured, and exclaimed all the time, your reader will soon long for a simpler flow of words. By all means sprinkle different dialogue tags throughout your work, but said, asked, answered, and replied are the preferred verbs.

Another important piece of advice I’ll always remember is how to use dialogue tags. I still see people writing: “It was so funny,” she laughed.  *Remember that you don’t usually laugh and speak at the same time. The same goes for sighed, sneezed, and spat for example. The piece of dialogue should finish and the action added in a new sentence or continuation: “It was so funny.” She laughed. (note fullstop and capital letter) or “It was so funny,” she said and laughed. (note comma and continuation adding the action in the sentence).
*edit: If you do use these tags be sure not to overuse them and make sure they work in context, it has been pointed out to me that it is quite acceptable to spit out words and laugh etc whilst talking, and, yes, I’ve certainly spat out an angry phrase before!

Four #WritingTips To Make Your Writing Better - The Last Krystallos

Dialogue from Beneath the Distant Star © Lisa Shambrook

2. Lose a good chunk of adverbs, or words ending ‘ly’. Please DO use them where they fit, and sometimes they’re the perfect word, but be sparing. For example if you’re writing about anger show the anger in the context of the story, demonstrate it to your reader through your character – for example (note the bold sentence):

“And it’s your birthday, why are you out here?”

Jasmine’s grin faded and a flushed smoulder spread across her features instead. “Well, at least someone remembered.”

“C’mon, we’ve got presents. Dad’s waiting for you downstairs. He’s waiting for us both. Aunty Rachel’s probably yelling up the stairs at us now!”

Jasmine’s face darkened further at the mention of her mother. “So, at least she’ll know what day it is now.”

I could easily have written:

“And it’s your birthday, why are you out here?”

“Well, at least someone remembered,” said Jasmine angrily.

“C’mon, we’ve got presents. Dad’s waiting for you downstairs. He’s waiting for us both. Aunty Rachel’s probably yelling up the stairs at us now!”

Jasmine’s face darkened further at the mention of her mother. “So, at least she’ll know what day it is now.”

The first example shows how the adverb just isn’t necessary and you learn much more about Jasmine’s response through the description, rather than just telling the reader she’s angry.
See my previous post: Don’t Just Tell Me, Show Me for more information about writing with emotion.
(Example text taken from Beneath the Distant Star book three of my Hope Within novels)

Stephen King On Writing Quote simplify - The Last Krystallos

Stephen King On Writing Quote – © Lisa Shambrook

3. Write simply. I love simplicity in my writing. You’re telling a story, not writing purple prose – unless you are, in which case, go for it! This does depend on your style, but most readers are more engaged in a story if it flows and simple words are usually less distracting. Stephen King told us not to be ashamed of our short words, my story is smoother and sleeker if my words, though beautiful and important, carry the reader without removing you from the experience.

That said – make sure your writing does contain appropriate big words unless you’re writing for small children. It was books I read as a child and teen that gave me my extensive vocabulary. There’s a lot to be said for looking up words in the dictionary and learning new ones. And I’m a huge fan of words, simple ones and complicated ones!

Four #WritingTips To Make Your Writing Better

Read aloud to find your spelling mistakes…I’m very sure my children were singing not sinning! © Lisa Shambrook

4. Lastly, the Best #WritingTip I’ve ever been given – Read your work out loud, especially dialogue. Reading through your work is imperative, in silence or aloud, but reading out loud gives a further depth to your work. Before reading out loud you’ll be sure there are no other distractions around and your attention is on your writing. You’ll engage more closely with your manuscript and you’ll hear it. You’ll hear the flaws, the way dialogue doesn’t flow, you’ll see the spelling errors Spellcheck didn’t highlight, and you’ll notice awkward sentences and placement. You’ll also hear what does work and be able to enjoy those passages that do!

If you can’t bear reading your work to yourself, find a friend or partner to do it, or use an app, you can even enable Word’s Text Speak command. Give it a try! Reading aloud has enhanced my writing and editing process hugely!

So, these are the tips that have really helped me – what has helped you most?

What makes your writing better?

What are your best writing tips?

Beneath the Rainbow, Oak and Stars…find Hope

Stand beneath the old oak’s boughs,
staring up at a late evening rainbow as its colours arc across the sky
and early stars begin to shimmer…
This is how the rainbows, oak and stars entwine.

The Hope Within Novels BLOG post

I’m so happy that all three Hope Within novels are now out and available. I thought it was time to show how they interweave and why the major themes are so important to me.

Beneath the Rainbow is an enchanting story of tragedy and the hope that rises from it. It introduces the theme of hope, the running melody through all three books.

Beneath the Rainbow AD with public reviews“It’s those silly dreams that keep us alive.”
Freya won’t let anything stand in her way. Not even death.
A heart-breaking event leaves Freya’s family devastated, but Freya has left clues to her secrets and her family need to uncover them before it’s too late.
As she watches from beyond, hope and stories of love prevail.  Her united family help, however, as final yearned for wishes remain unfulfilled, time begins to run out.
Freya is certain she’s the only one who can help as precious life hangs in the balance.

When loss hits a family, grief is the strongest emotion and as hearts break human nature struggles to find something to cling to. Hope is the emotion we clutch and pull into our souls to help rescue us from the despair and pain.

Freya’s family needs hope and Freya has it in abundance. She is the only one who can help when life reaches crisis point.

The subtheme of Beneath the Rainbow is dreams…as quoted by the tag line “It’s those silly dreams that keep us alive.” Sometimes we need dreams to give us hope and sometimes they keep us alive!

Beneath the Old Oak is a beautifully woven tale that follows Freya’s story with her best friend, Meg.  Meg has grown up with loss in her life from the young age when she lost her best friend, Freya. She’s desperate to know where she fits in and the subtheme of her story is courage to face adversity.

Beneath the Old Oak AD with public reviews“Turn those dreams of escape into hope…”
Meg thinks her mother is broken. Is she broken too?
Meg’s life spirals out of control, and when she mirrors her mother’s erratic behaviour she’s terrified she’ll inherit her sins.
Seeking refuge and escape she finds solace beneath a huge, old oak. Life seems as transient as leaves upon the tree and as the seasons change the timeworn oak shares its treasured memories with her.
Meg wants to run away, but a devastating storm will change her life forever.

Meg has no idea how her life will play out when it spirals out of control and she has to face mental illness and a tragic past within her family. All she wants to do is escape, but her mother beats her to it.

She needs to change her dreams of escape (there we are again: dreams, linking with Rainbow) and turn them into hope. Meg’s challenge is not to lose hope when all seems lost.

Beneath the Distant Star is a turbulent story which takes us right back to Freya’s family. Her sister, Jasmine, was only a toddler when she lost Freya and cannot remember her at all. She fights her sister’s memory determined to become her own person and not Freya’s ghost.

Beneath the Distant Star AD with public reviews“Discover what you already have.”
Jasmine feels like the ghost of the sister she can no longer remember.
Her existence reminds her mother she has something her sister never will—life—and their fragile relationship shatters.
Jasmine craves love and acceptance but refuses to be her sister, Freya, and fights to become her own person. Life becomes a battleground as she disregards the rules and resolves to live her life to the fullest.
Jasmine’s reckless abandon threatens to destroy the very thing she needs most. 

Like Meg, Jasmine wants to fit in, but her battles alienate her from those who love her, and she loses hope of ever being the daughter her parents want. Jasmine craves acceptance and love and needs her mother to come to terms with her grief. Bringing us the subtheme of gratitude for what you already have. We sometimes disregard, or just miss, the beauty of what we have for what we’ve lost.

It brings the novels full circle fourteen years after Freya’s death as hope becomes the one force they can all cling to and build upon. Freya, Meg and Jasmine all need to find Hope Within.

The Hope Within Twitter AD JPEG

So, if you’re looking for books that will inspire and lift your spirit and steal your heart the Hope Within series will do just that.

Rainbow Stars Times New Yorker

Each theme means a great deal to me and has touched me personally. Though I haven’t lost anyone in my life, we have all felt grief at some point, it universally unites us as humankind. Dreams are what inspire me…the reasons I keep moving and working to achieve. Courage is something we all fight for and it grows with us, and gratitude is a constant, something that keeps us grounded.

Hope embodies all of these and inspires us to keep reaching for those distant stars…

Add these books to your reading list and feel inspired!

Buy here: Beneath the Rainbow, Beneath the Old Oak and Beneath the Distant Star.